I remember back when I was a kid. We had school pictures once a year, and they were a pretty big deal. Everyone got dressed up, our moms combed our hair extra well before we left for school, and then our pictures (no matter how goofy) ended up being displayed throughout the house.

Well, it’s still a big deal, but… It now happens twice a year and the packages have gotten much bigger and more expensive. It seems that the new expectation is for us to buy pictures during both the fall and the spring.

On top of this, our preschool takes pictures twice a year, as well. The real bummer for us this past week is that they sent the proof home and Son #4 (three years old) promptly snatched it off the table and lost it. Not a huge deal, right? Well… For whatever reason, the proof costs far more than a regular picture, and we’d be on the hook for it if we didn’t return it by today.

The real bummer of this is that the proof has a big watermark across it declaring that it’s the property of the photographer. Thus, even if it eventually turned up, it would be of no use to use.

Thankfully, under intense questioning, he had a moment of toddler clarity and told us he had slipped it under the carpet in the living room (we have a large area rug over hardwood in that room). Ah, yes, of course… We looked high and low, but not quite low enough.

Not long ago, I wrote about some issues that our two year old was having with preschool separation anxiety. Well, that time has passed, and I’m happy to say that the transition to preschool couldn’t have gone better for our youngest. [more]

According to a recent study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, children who are praised for being intelligent (as in “You’re so smart…”) are can become highly sensitive to failure, making them less likely to take risks and more likely to give up when faced with a difficult challenge.

So next time you feel like praising your child for their success, bite your tongue and say:

“Hey idiot, nice job. Clearly you just got lucky, but it’s better to be lucky than good.”

I kid, I kid…

Rather, the recommended course of action is to give your kids specific praise for their effort, strategy, etc. For example, when your child does especially well on a test, compliment their study habits rather than their intellect.

Our youngest son recently started preschool. He had a great time at the Open House where he met his teacher and played with the toys, all in the comforting presence of mom and dad. The first day of school was exciting for him. [more]

Just a quick update to my previous post about our kindergartner’s classroom stress. As expected, he made it through his first day with the new schoolwork and hand-raising rules without any problems, and he already seems to be forgetting about his worries. Also, after talking to him a bit more, it seems that I need to clarify a few details. [more]

Boy, oh boy is this kindergarten thing stressful… Last night just before bed, Son #3 started expressing concern about the fact that kids who don’t finish their work don’t get to go to recess. While that seems like a perfectly reasonable rule, he was really getting worked up about it. When I took him aside and asked him about it, he said that he hadn’t ever missed recess, but he seemed really worried that it might happen. I then explained to him that it’s not supposed to be a scary rule, they just want to make sure that all of the kids sit down and get their work done instead of messing around. That seemed to pacify him, but… [more]

We’ve written previously about the difficulties our son is having with starting Kindergarten. Things have really settled down since the first couple of weeks, and I credit two changes that we made for the remarkable transformation.

First, we moved his bed time up an hour. He now starts getting ready for bed at the shockingly early hour of 6 and is usually asleep before 6:30. Because of this, he even woke up on his own the last few mornings.

Second, I resorted to bribery (err, positive reinforcement). I promised him that if he got on the bus without protesting for the entire week, I would play the video game of his choice with him for 15 minutes. You should have seen his eyes light up, because he knows I detest playing video games. I then decided to take it one step further. I told him that if he stays on a “green lily pad” all week, then I would play another 15 minutes with him. (Note: His teacher moves each child’s frog to a yellow and then a red lily pad if they misbehave.) He could earn a whopping 30 minutes of mommy video time!

These two things seem to have done the trick. He gets on the bus each morning with a spring in his step and a smile on his face. Last week he had all green lily pads too! My only saving grace is that I am REALLY bad at the video games. He just might get frustrated enough with me that he’ll let me out of my obligation. To tell you the truth, I enjoyed the time I spent with him. Last weekend I played for forty minutes without even realizing it. He’s been doing so well with Kindergarten that I have a feeling I’ll be putting in my half hour this weekend. No biggy… Seeing those green lily pads makes it all worthwhile.

Just two days after our kindergartner had a meltdown getting on the school bus, he acted up in school and received a “red lily pad” - this is the worst of three levels on the all-important green/yellow/red “lily pad” behavioral scale. From what my wife has been able to glean of the situation, he pushed another little boy in the bathroom, and he later bent a little girl’s finger back and made her cry. Lovely. The details are a bit fuzzy, as he’s feigning memory loss, but… You know that mean little boy that kids always complain about? Unfortunately, Son #3 was that boy yesterday. [more]

After a seemingly successful transition into the new school year, our kindergartner had a meltdown right as the bus pulled up to pick up the boys this morning. The long days have been taking a toll on him, and he’s recently begun asking if he can stay home and go back to sleep. Obviously, that’s not an option, so we’ve hustled him off to school every morning right on schedule. [more]

Our three oldest went back to school this week. The first day had its share of bumps in the road. I barely slept the night before for fear that I had forgotten to fill out one form or another or that I would forget to pack a snack. Everything went off without a hitch: boys were dressed in their new school t-shirts, hair was styled (with gel, no less!), breakfast was eaten, teeth were brushed, shoes and backpacks were donned, and pictures were taken. Even the bus was on time. Without a hitch? Not! [more]