An Insolent Child, Part II: Is He Rude or Just Clueless?

Written by mom - 4 Comments

One time I volunteered to take my son’s friend to a birthday party that they were both invited to (a different little boy from the one in Part I). Boy was that a BIG mistake! It was the most embarrassing two hours of my life. At one point this friend used a plastic fork to pop balloons, after which he would laugh maniacally. He ran around like a chicken with its head cut off and wouldn’t listen to any of the mothers. My son, on the other hand, was a perfect gentleman. I was torn! If the crazy kid were my child I would have left the party with my tail between my legs. Yet, my son was having fun, and I didn’t want to detract from that.

At the end of the party, the host mom wanted a group picture. The insubordinate child wanted to sit next to the birthday boy for the photo, and he was willing to push everybody out of the way in pursuit of his goal. I had to pick him up and drag him crying from the room. Needless to say, he missed the picture.

We finally made it to the end of the party, and I couldn’t wait to drop him at home. I told his mom that he might be upset about not being in the group picture, because he wouldn’t cooperate. She told me not to worry and that he probably wouldn’t even remember it. Excuse me? What about an apology to me? What about a promise to talk to him about his disobedience?

At the time his mom had a lot on her plate (won’t go in to detail), and was unaware of his repeated behavior problems. He generally wreaked havoc at any social gathering. An infraction of any magnitude was given minimal attention. What’s the deal? Lack of observation? Total denial? Probably both, but it’s not as simple as that…

Someone finally got through to her! I’ve just recently learned that he’ll be evaluated for some behavior issues. I’m hoping that early intervention and the love of his family will help him become the sweet, nurturing boy that his mom mistakenly believes he already is, and may still actually become.

Published on May 4th, 2007 - 4 Comments
Filed under: Daily Life
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Comments (scroll down to add your own):

  1. If all you told her was that he wouldn’t cooperate, I can see how she would brush that off. She wasn’t there and didn’t know exactly how awful the child was–I think you have to be a little more direct with her. On the other hand, if the child is like that in public, he’s probably like that at home…

    Comment by Mama Money — May 4th 2007 @ 10:01 am
  2. My guess is that the child was clueless, but that leads to being rude. Hopefully things are on the mend and he is learning a little more of what society (should) expect from him.

    Comment by Blaine Moore — May 4th 2007 @ 10:49 am
  3. Mama Money-
    You’re absolutely right, I should have been more direct with her. It was definitely a missed opportunity. In my defense, I’ve only known her for a short time and she had “A LOT on her plate” at the time. I chickened out to save our fledgling friendship (say that fast three times!). I also felt other adults in her life (e.g. his preschool teacher, grandma, aunt) had a better perspective. I’m just glad someone clued her in and it didn’t have to be me.

    Comment by mom — May 4th 2007 @ 7:23 pm
  4. Mom, no way should you say something. After all it’s easier from a family or really close friend than just a new friend. Plus it’s not the kid’s fault, it’s the parents. But sounds like it’s under control more now that she’s less stressed.

    Comment by Livingalmostlarge — May 7th 2007 @ 4:50 pm

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